


They never know

by Domlicious



Category: Chanbaek - Fandom, EXO (Band)
Genre: Eventual Smut, Fan Park Chanyeol, Fluff, Idol Byun Baekhyun, M/M, Mutual Pining, Romance, Secrets
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-11
Updated: 2019-12-26
Packaged: 2021-01-27 15:46:27
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,919
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21394666
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Domlicious/pseuds/Domlicious
Summary: Baby tell me where the line is.Chanyeol would never have thought what a harmless flirtation would trigger during a concert with idol Byun Baekhyun. He was just a fan. At least that's what everyone thought.The line was crossed quickly.
Relationships: ChanBaek - Relationship
Comments: 1
Kudos: 43





	1. Chapter 1

Grinning, I stared at my phone. I was finally where I wanted to be for an eternity. It had cost me a lot of persuasion that my boyfriend had finally agreed that I was allowed to fly to Japan. He was always too worried that something might happen. But honestly, what should happen to me between a lot of little girls and women? They always found it cute when a "fanboy" was in their midst. Never had I had any problems. It was not my first concert that I attended. Okay, so far I've always sat in the stands somewhere when my favourite band was in Seoul. I had been on every tour during their five-year career. I've noticed how the locations got bigger and bigger. How they sold out the halls several times in a row and their shows became bigger and more spectacular. And it filled me with pride that I was there from the beginning. And today I was closer to them than ever. I stood directly at the barrier in front of the middle stage, where they performed most of the time and held their ments.

It was a shame that in Japan it was strictly forbidden to take pictures or videos during the show. I would have liked to have my boys and especially my bias photographed and filmed. Secretly, I took a picture of the stage and sent the picture to my boyfriend.

**Yeol**

_Baaaabyyyyy, look where my place is. That will be sooo good._

My message was spiked with emojis expressing my enthusiasm. A few minutes later, the answer came from my boyfriend. I was not disappointed that it took him longer to answer me, after all he was very busy.

**Baby**

_Please take care of yourself. Don’t let your eyes scratch out._

_I want to get you back uninjured_

I smiled even more down on my phone. He was so incredibly caring that I felt very warm in the stomach.

**Yeol**

_Do you think they will scratch my eyes out when I scream for my bias?_

**Baby**

_I think as long as you don’t sceam obscene things, that should not be a problem_

**Yeol**

_But how should my bias otherwise know how horny he makes me?_

**Baby**

_Believe me, he knows that too: D: D: D_

I laughed softly to myself. Curious looks were directed at me. Of course, I caught their eyes like a colourful dog. I felt sorry for all the girls behind me, who probably would not really get to see anything from the concert. I could not hide my 1.85m. But I didn’t want to give up my place at the barrier. My bias should notice me. That was my goal for the evening. Finally, I had something special in mind. I wanted him to smile. Maybe there was also a fingerheart in store for me.

**Yeol**

_Okay baby, I have to be mentally prepared to tear away the ground under my bias feet with my charm _

**Baby**

_Good that I'm not jealous;)_

_Have fun, we'll talk later_

_I love you_

**Yeol**

_You also have no reason for jealousy_

_After all, you are my great love; *_

_Until later, my sweetheart_

_Have fun too_

Smiling, I put my phone in my pocket. I no longer expected an answer from him. It was also close to seven and Exo always started on time.

"Are you a fanboy?", The girl suddenly asked next to me and I looked down at her. She was so tiny and had to put her head back to look up at me.

That was the moment when I was glad to have included Japanese in my degree program. I rarely had the opportunity to prove my Japanese knowledge that I had almost euphorically answered. "Of course, I love Exo. This is my third tour, which I join, but my first concert in Japan. Usually I always go to Seoul. I'm so curious how it is here," I beamed at her.

"Awww how cute," she croaked. "Do you have a bias?"

"If I have a bias? What is that a question? Of course, I have one. Baekhyun! "

The little girl cried out and started bouncing up and down as she clapped her hands enthusiastically. "Oh my god, Baekhyun is also my bias. He is so cute, right?"

I nodded, grinning. Oh yes, he was cute, but also so unspeakably hot. He had sides, not everybody knew them. But I was not everyone ...

"How long have you been a fan? Did you ever meet them at a fan meeting? How old are you?" Her questions were so wonderfully innocent. "Do you think Baekhyun is dating someone?" Or not so innocent.

I laughed sheepishly. "Hahaha, I'm here from the beginning. To be honest, I've never been to a fan meeting before. And I am 23."

"Oh, as old as Baekhyunnie and Chen," she cheered. "You are ... Chingus it’s said in Korea, right?"

I nodded in agreement, but hoped that she had forgotten the other question. Baekhyun's relationship status was a big secret and nothing was going outside. Since the beginning of his career he had not even been involved in rumours or scandals.

"I'll ship him secretly with Sehun," she mumbled. "But I think that's really just fan service."

"That's definitely only fan service," I agreed energetically.

Curious, she looked at me. "And you flew to Tokyo because of Exo?"

I nodded, grinning. "Yes, I always wanted to see them live outside of Seoul. See how different they are when they are not on stage in their hometown."

"Wow, you really have to make a lot of money, so you can just afford it," she marvelled. By now she was completely turned to me.

Embarrassed, I scratched the back of my head. "Not really. I am student. My boyfriend gave me this trip and paid the costs," I confessed.

"Oh man, I'm getting more and more jealous. You have a boyfriend who does not have a problem with you loving a idol and paying so you can see him?"

"Erm ... yes." I bit my lower lip to stop my grin.

"Your boyfriend must be a great man," she breathed.

"Yes, he is. He is not in vain the love of my life," I sighed dreamily.

She wanted to say something else, but when the lights went out and the screen came on, she turned around screaming. Grinning, I looked at her before I looked forward too. I had already seen the show a couple of times in Seoul. So, I knew exactly when it came to what, who stood where and who would say what, as most of the Ments were script. But never before was I so close to the stage that I could see every drop of sweat on their perfectly painted faces.

My eyes were on Baekhyun from the moment he stepped on the stage. His white hair was like a halo that made him shine. Fittingly, he also wore blue contact lenses that evening. He looked like Jack Frost, one of my favourite animated characters. But he might just as easily be an angel. Surprisingly, he wore hardly make up today. No heavy eye shadow, no contouring or this lip gloss that made the lips look fuller. Only a narrow line of eyeliner graced his shining eyes. He looked younger than he was, and as they walked down the way to the middle stage during the third song and the fans screamed their names, he got that glow that I found so fascinating about him. That radiance that showed how happy he was at that moment, that he could stand on stage and do what he loved.

But while Sehun and Kai grinned at me broadly, I missed any attention from my bias. It hurt me more than it should.

Maybe he had noticed, or he was made aware of by the others, because when it finally came to the first Ment, he finally looked at me directly, without me having to call after him. Okay, the kid next to me had already taken over for me anyway. Excited, she waved the fan which had Baekhyun's face on it in the air. Baekhyun laughed at her, making her squeal so shrilly that I feared I would not get that shrill sound out of my ear so quickly. With a slightly pained face, I rubbed over said ear. But I could not blame her. Heaven Lord God, after all, he was Byun Baekhyun. And his eyes drifted from her to me and his whole facial expressions changed. His smile became even wider and more rectangular, showing so much more of his gleaming white teeth, his eyes forming into my beloved little crescents and his cheeks got squishy so hard that I wanted to bite into them. He gave me that special smile that would make me kneel in front of him in the dirt.

Timidly he raised a hand and waved to me slightly. His beautiful long, slender fingers were adorned with five colourful, narrow rings that were homemade and made of small pearls. In the fandom was speculated who made them for him. And as long as he did not tell who had done the work for him, it would probably remain a mystery forever. I had no problem with that, after all, it was his private life. And that was sacred to him.

"Oh my gosh, Baekhyun knows we exist," the little girl yelled excitedly, grabbing me by the upper arm and shaking me.

Baekhyun's eyes were still on me, but he jumped in alarm as Sehun pushed him because it was his turn. Embarrassed and caught, Baekhyun rubbed his neck before greeting the fans and introducing himself unnecessarily. As if someone in the hall did not know who he was.

Again, I was pleased that I had learned Japanese.

And before he turned around, after Sehun had held his ment, he actually grinned at me crookedly and cheekily. The fucker knew how he could make me weak knees. A smile from him made me do everything for him.

** Flashback **

"Hahaha hyung, are you avoiding Haemin, or why do you want to accompany us to training?"

Blindfolded, I shoved my best friend and neighbour on the shoulder. "She is too attached to me and annoys me. I didn’t want to go shopping with her again and carry her bags. And her shrill voice causes me unpleasant goose bumps and migraines."

"Then why are you still together with her?" My other best friend asked me.

"Good question Jongin, good question," I sighed.

"Do you even love her?", Sehun asked me.

"No," I answered honestly.

"Did you ever love or at least like her?" Jongin asked.

"No," I said dryly. "She looks good but is stupid and humourless. It's no fun to be with her."

"Then end it with her," moaned my best friend annoyed. "I wish I had time for a girlfriend."

"Me too," Jongin wailed theatrically. "We have such cute female trainees, but we don’t even have time to date."

I rolled my eyes. "Your own fault. You really wanted to become idols."

"I'm only doing that because my dad promised me a PlayStation," Jongin pouted.

"That makes it all sadder," I laughed as we walked into the SM Ent building.

"You have the time and the pain of choice, Hyung. So many girls are running after you. You can quickly replace Haemin. Seek the love of your life. She might be waiting for you around the next corner," Sehun said.

"Love of my life," I huffed. "I am only 17. I expect the love of my life only in ten years."

"Oh, there you are. We are waiting for you. Get changed quickly. Room 3."

My head jerked right and I could only see a brown-haired back of the head before disappearing around the next corner.

"W-who was that?" I asked in amazement.

"Oh, that's the new trainee. He joined last week, and he is sooo good. Is not he, Nini? "

Jongin nodded. "Baekhyun hyung is cool and totally funny. He's as old as you, hyung. I really like him."

"Do you stay here? After training, we can introduce him to you," Sehun suggested.

I did not know exactly what moved me, but I nodded. "Sure, I can do my homework during that time."

"Hahaha, what you are doing to avoid your girlfriend. Hyung, just break up with her ", Sehun laughed and patted my shoulder before disappearing into the locker room with Jongin.

Pffff homework my ass. As if I could concentrate on math or English for only a minute, while eight guys were doing their daily routine. Although I had to admit that I was amazed that there were only eight, including two new ones. But Johnny, who was from the beginning, at least since Sehun was a Trainee and I accompanied him as an occasional, was missing. But that was not even what distracted me so much.

This one little Cutie, which was new, put me under his spell and that literally. I thought that sometimes I did not even blink while I stared at him. Never in my recent 17-year life had I seen such a handsome boy. Screw that, never had I ever seen such a pretty person. He was smaller than me, which was no surprise. Most of my age were smaller than me. He was very slim but had curves that you would not expect from a guy. Broad shoulders and pelvis, narrow hips, full thighs and a butt that the girls at my school could only dream of. His body was perfect. But the biggest eye-catcher was just his beautiful face. Small dark brown puppy eyes that formed into crescents when he laughed (which by the way was the nicest laugh I've ever heard), the cutest little nose ever and a mouth, oh my fucking god, that looked like a pink rosebud , his lips looked so delicious and sweet, especially when he pouted so charmingly. He sprayed puppy charm and I felt the need to sweep him through his fluffy looking brown hair or patted his head.

Fuck, I was whipped without ever having a word with him.

Three hours and not a single math assignment from me later, the eight trainees sat in a semicircle on the floor while I sat in my corner pretending to read something for the English lesson instead of watching Baekhyun. I was less successful in that. At least my best friend seemed to find it amusing when he made me aware that I was holding my book upside down. Everyone laughed at me, except Baekhyun. He just smiled slightly and lowered his eyes. Apparently, my stare was not as subtle as I thought.

"I'm allowed to announce something today," Junmyeon said. "You're probably wondering why we're only eight today. The thing is, from now on I will be training exactly in this lineup in the next few weeks. "

"Why Hyung?", Jongin asked.

Junmyeon smiled widely. "Because we're going to debut together next year."

What followed was a wild, loud confusion. It was a mixture of irrepressible joy and utter incredulity. Only one sat completely shocked and pointed to himself.

"I? Why me? Why should I debut? But I came to you only last week. What about Johnny?" Baekhyun breathed stunned.

"Yes, but you're damn good and fits in well with the planned concept. You should also be the main vocalist with Kyungsoo and Jongdae," Junmyeon explains. "Please don’t feel bad that you have overtaken some who trained much longer."

"But ... but that's unfair," he murmured, and I got the urge to hug him and pat his head.

"This business is not about fairness, Baekhyun. You have to seize every opportunity that is offered to you. Because it could be the only and last." Junmyeon, who had been a trainee here for years, probably knew what he was talking about.

I did not get any more from their exchange, because I was overrun by my best friends, who could not believe their luck, that they were allowed to debut together in one and the same band.

"Hyung, Hyung, can you believe that? Can you believe that? ", Jongin yelled into my ear while Sehun leaned against my shoulder, howling. "We are becoming famous."

I patted Sehun's head and nodded to Jongin with a smile. "You will become the best band K-pop has ever seen."

"Will you be our fan?", Sehun sniffed.

"The biggest of all," I confirmed.

"Can I be your bias?" Jongin chuckled.

"I think Hyung has already picked another bias," Sehun whispered, and I blushed.

Jongin followed Sehun's gaze, and so we all stared at Baekhyun. "Ahhh, I understand," Jongin finally breathed and both dropped off when Baekhyun realized we were staring at him.

My heart skipped a beat when he actually came up to us. "Hey, Junmyeon said we all go to karaoke together to celebrate. It's on him. Does he do that more often?"

"Oh Baekhyun Hyung, you have no idea how fucking rich he is. Get used to it," Sehun laughed, beating him friendly on the back and he and Jongin left me alone with Baekhyun.

"Hi ... uhm ... erm ... I'm new here," he mumbled.

"I know," I smiled sheepishly.

"My name is Baekhyun."

"Chanyeol ... well ... I'm Chanyeol," I laughed. "Sehun's best friend. And Jongin’s too. Yes ... erm ... I am their Hyung. So ... hiiiii?" Oh God, I would have liked to slap myself. Or better yet, bury myself.

Baekhyun laughed. "You're funny. So, you come too. To karaoke, I mean. "

"If ... if I may?"

Baekhyun turned to the others. "Hey guys, do you have a problem if Chanyeol would come along?"

"NO!" "NO PROBLEM." "WOULD NOT BE THE FIRST TIME." We were called and Baekhyun turned to me with a smile. His smile was fucking rectangular and perfect and charming and cute. This smile was to kneel down. And at that moment, I did not know yet that I would do exactly that two hours later. That I kneeled in front of him in a cabin from the men's room and I wondered if I like guys.

The next day I broke up with Haemin.

** Flashback end **

"Oppa, how long have you been with your boyfriend?" My new acquaintance asked me as we waited for Baekhyun's solo. That she called me Oppa, I found somehow cute. She showed respect for our Korean form of address.

"To be honest, we have our six-year today," I smiled at her and her jaw dropped. For a moment she really seemed speechless.

"Today is your 6th anniversary and you're off to an Exo concert instead? Your boyfriend really does not bother that?"

Innocently, I shrugged. "He is pretty busy. His job keeps him on track and he wouldn’t have had time for me today anyway."

"And that's okay with you? That he puts his job over you?"

"It's not like he has another choice. But hey, I can at least watch my favourite band," I laughed. "I know he loves me and we just celebrate when I’m back. Besides, he always dedicates all his free time to me."

"I still can not believe that your boyfriend is not jealous that you love an idol."

I laughed out loud. "Because he has absolutely no reason."

"That's right," she sighed thoughtfully. "Byun Baekhyun is unreachable. We should settle for his smile, right? We'll never get more from him. "

"Yes," I mumbled. "You should."

The show continued without any mistakes or complications. The guys performed as if they had been born for it. They had grown so much since their debut almost six years ago. Confident they interacted with the fans. During their second ment, Baekhyun stared at me all the time and I thought I had something on my face. Confused, I stroked my cheek, nose and forehead, but there was nothing. Even my "new friend" noticed it and kept looking at me. Baekhyun tilted his head in amusement and smiled at me. From the moment I was just waiting for the camera to catch me at some point and show me on the screen, because my bias probably thought it’s funny to make me blush.

I was already trying to implement my plan now that I had his undivided attention, but it was too early. If I didn’t have the desired success with it, it would be embarrassing to get through the entire Encore up front. So I just shot a couple of finger hearts in his direction and wobbled suggestively with my eyebrows. This made Baekhyun laugh loudly and in the middle of Chen's ment. Startled, he clapped his hands over his mouth. But his vibrating little body (okay ... he was not that small, but in comparison to me he was really tiny) revealed that he was still laughing. When he calmed down, he pretended to rip his throbbing heart out of his chest and throw it in my direction. Playfully, I caught it and stroked it tenderly until I swallowed his imaginary heart. Suddenly it was like being in our own world. We flirted in gestures, facial expressions, and sign language until we were brutally ripped out of it by Suho, giving Baekhyun a head nut and reminding him of his own ment. My bias held his ment with a bright red head, but his eyes were brighter than any star in the night sky. I actually fell in love with him a little more. And it was not that hard to love two men at the same time.

While the video was on the screen in front of the Encore, all the girls around me stared at me. Of course, that was to be expected.

"Ooooppaaaaa, he flirted with you," shouted the girl whose name I still did not know. But I had never asked her before.

"No, no ... he does not," I tried to play it down. "That was just friendly."

Her eyes narrowed as she studied me closely. "You're hiding something from me. You know each other? You said you never met them at a fan meeting."

"I did not." I lowered my voice because I did not want everyone around me to know. "Okay, what's your name?" I finally asked her name.

"Kimiko," she answered, surprised.

"Okay Kimiko, that stays with us now, okay? Do you understand me?"

She slowly nodded her head and I sighed softly.

"Sehun and Jongin are my best friends since childhood and that's why I know the rest of Exo and therefore also Baekhyun personally. So I did not lie when I said I never went to a fan meeting. I already knew them during their trainee time."

With her mouth open, she stared at me. Kimiko took a while to find her voice again. "And Baekhyun knows that he is your bias?"

I nodded.

"And he knows you have a boyfriend?"

I nodded again.

"And your boyfriend knows that you know your bias personally?"

"Yeah, everybody knows."

"And there are really no problems with that?"

"Everyone knows where his place is," I nodded.

"This is so ridiculous, but also totally crazy," she breathed. "What's on your banner? You have never held it up yet."

Quickly I pressed the banner even more to my chest. "A message to Baekhyun. I'll pick it up when the time comes."

"And when does it come?"

"Soon," I mumbled as the Encore began and the boys returned to the stage with their black tour T-shirts.

After the first Encore song they sang their new Japanese song, which they only performed in Japan. It was my first time hearing it live and I was thrilled how the ExoLs could all sing along, even though the song had come out shortly before. But that also meant that the end was approaching. And not only the end, but also my project. I had already reached my goal. My bias had noticed me. But I needed one last time for his attention this evening. Just once more! During the final ment I could not and did not want to draw his attention to myself, because I knew what my stunt could do and the last thing I wanted was that I made it uncomfortable for the other guys and especially for Baekhyun.

Patiently I waited until they had finished their speeches and started the last song for the evening. Smile on my face. And I hoped that with my message, I could give just that. A smile on Baekhyun's face.

"I stuck there for a long time," Baekhyun began to sing his part and turned his eyes in my direction. I could not tell if he was focused on me or someone else. "I weakly look at you who is far. I don’t understand why I’m like this, just like the day I let you go." He smiled weakly and I chose the moment when Jongin took over singing to raise my banner. Hoping that Baekhyun's eyes really were mine.

**Marry me, Byun Baekhyun!**

It was not a question. No request. That was what I wanted. More than anything else in the world.

And while the other seven walked their rounds on stage, Baekhyun stood motionless in front of me. His facial expression betrayed nothing, but his eyes became glassy.

"To be honest, everything about you is so clear, even your name, speech and gaze", I heard my best friend Sehun singing with Jongdae.

“The memories loving you, they just bury inside my heart naturally”, Minseok continued singing and Beakhyun's hand trembled as he brought his microphone to his mouth to continue singing.

"I did it all with a smile on my face, the traces have disappeared in my memories. What if they return to me? I'll just smile and send them back. "

I bit my lower lip and held out the banner. He took a step toward me, pausing for a moment, then took the last two steps to the edge of the stage to receive the banner. I did not expect an answer from him. He did not owe me either. My goal was that he knew what I wanted, no matter how embarrassing our next meeting would be.

When the first tear fell, he turned and hurried to the main stage where the others had gathered. Like in a trance, I stared after him and when I woke up, the concert was already over. The lights went on and it got hectic around me. Excited, the fans exchanged among themselves, fangirled loud or as in my case, were stared.

"What was on the banner? Baekhyun looked so touched."

"He was?" I asked, puzzled.

"Oppa, are you blind? He pressed it to his chest as he ran back. That was really big on the screen.”

"Oh, I did not pay attention to that", I confessed with embarrassment and buried my hands in my jeans pockets. My fingers felt the backstage pass, but I did not intend to use it. I did not want to see my friends yet. Sehun and Jongin would certainly have fun in moking me with my action and I was not in the mood to endure it.

"So what was written on it?" Kimiko insisted. "I can not read Korean."

"Something personal, sorry," I mumbled.

"Ohhh Oppa," she pouted, but I did not soften. The vibration of my cell phone in my pocket saved me even more.

**Baby**

_Hey, how was the concert?_

"Sorry, this is my boyfriend," I apologized to her.

**Yeol**

_Good as always._

_Was not to be expected otherwise._

**Baby**

_And has your bias paid attention to you?_

**Yeol**

_If I said yes, would you be jealous?_

**Baby**

_Would I have a reason?_

**Yeol**

_He flirted with me. And jealous?_

**Baby**

_Hmmm, to be honest yes_

**Yeol**

_Do not worry, he does not love me the way you love me_

**Baby**

_Are you sure?_

**Yeol**

_Where are you?_

**Baby**

_On the way back from my job_

**Yeol**

_You must be exhausted_

**Baby**

_I am, but let's talk later_

_When you are back at the hotel_

**Yeol**

_OK_

**Baby**

_Please be careful on the way back_

_I would prefer it if you had ridden with the others_

**Yeol**

_You mean with my bias? ;)_

**Baby**

_Yes_

**Yeol**

_It's better this way_

_I think he has to think about something anyway_

_But I will be careful_

**Baby**

_OK_

**Yeol**

_OK_

**Baby**

_By the way, the answer is yes_


	2. Chapter 2

By the way, the answer is yes. By the way, the answer is yes. By the way, the answer is yes.  
I could not think of anything else when I was sitting in the subway. With me were other Exo fans in the compartment, but I paid no attention to anyone. Apparently, I did not land on the screen during the concert. Somehow it reassured me that my action had not made me a celebrity. Nevertheless, I listened to their conversations, but pretended to sleep.  
I was finally able to get off five stops further. I had to walk the short way from the subway station to my hotel. The icy wind was like a slap in the face as I entered the open air. During the concert it had started to snow. Meanwhile, a layer of snow one centimeter thick had formed on the sidewalks and the streets were ghostly empty. I looked at my watch and found that it was already past 11pm. The concert had ended shortly before 10pm. Did I really need so long to come here?  
My footsteps got faster, and the snow crunched under my shoes. The wet seeped through the fabric of my sneakers and I cursed myself for not putting on weatherproof winter shoes. After all, it was December just before Christmas. I would have to expect icy cold and snow. It was not better in Seoul either.  
My hot breath fizzled into white clouds as I almost ran to my hotel. I urgently needed to talk to my boyfriend. We had almost an hour left from our six-year anniversary. I still had a good 70 minutes to make him happy. After all, it was the first time in six years that we could not really spend December 21st together.  
When I arrived at the hotel, I politely nodded to the staff before heading straight to the elevators. With my room card I allowed myself access to the 32nd floor. I breathed heavily as I leaned against the mirror and examined my reflection. My cheeks and nose were red, and my dark hair was messy, but I did not have time to fix them as the doors opened again. Unerringly, I headed for my room. I wanted to do so many things at the same time, especially put on something warm, warm me up and eat something. But first I had to explain this marriage proposal to my boyfriend. I hoped so that he was not angry or disappointed with me.  
With shaky hands I lifted the card in front of the lock, which opened the door with a soft peep and a click. My heart was thumping as I entered the foyer carefully. Quietly I slipped out of my shoes and slipped to the living room. I peeled off my winter jacket, which I threw carelessly on the couch. It was so quiet. Suspiciously quiet. It should not be so quiet. I let my eyes wander to the big bed. It was done with care and the bedding was white. As expected from a five-star hotel. It was neat. Too neat.  
I reached into the inside pocket of my jacket and pulled out the little black box. Time ran away from me. 60 minutes before another day dawned. 120 minutes if I go to the Korean time.  
A warm breeze and a low humming caught my attention and I turned around. Out of the bath joined Baekhyun wearing a white robe. With a white towel he rubbed his hair dry but stopped when he discovered me. We looked at each other silently until he started to smile at me and breathed a softly "Yeollie".  
I let out air that I was holding and walked towards him. I wanted to kneel in front of him, but when he realized what I was up to, he grabbed my upper arms and held me tight.  
"What are you doing? I already said yes."  
"I want to do it well," I wailed, shaking off his hands.  
"What was not reasonable about that, Yeol?" He asked confused. "Please get up," he pleaded as I knelt down in front of him.  
Stubbornly, I shook my head. "I asked the idol Byun Baekhyun to marry me. Something that many other fans had done before me. But I want to ask my boyfriend if he wants to marry me and that's how it should be. So please let me."  
Baekhyun sighed softly and left his arms hanging limply beside his body. "Okay, do what you have to do. If you put something in your head, I can’t beat it out of your head anyway."  
"Exactly," I nodded, satisfied. "And don’t interrupt me anymore."  
He pressed his lips together to suppress a laugh or even a grin, but he nodded politely.  
Puzzled that he was listening to me, I hesitated, but he looked patiently down at me. However, his eyes became alarmingly glassy. "Baby, exactly six years ago you decided to give us a chance. We both didn’t know if it was a smart decision. You were about to make your debut and we both could only guess how difficult it would be between us. I had always hoped that we could do it. We put a lot of work into our relationship, understanding, patience and trust. It was not always easy for me. Especially in the first two years when we kept our relationship secret from everyone, even from our friends and families, for fear we might get caught. I was often jealous for no reason, but in the end, you always managed to show me that I'm the only one for you. And you were and always are the only one for me. I love you so much, baby. I love your ambition, your passion and your love in everything you do. You are my sunshine who warms me, my moonlight who illuminates my darkness, my radiant star who shines to show me the way."  
Baekhyun sniffed softly, but I was not deterred by my prepared speech. I had to tell him all that, so he understood why I wanted him and not the idol. "Baekhyun, you inspire me. When I look at you, I can think of a thousand ideas on how to design our first home together. Unlike you, I may still be a poor student, but I want to create you a home. I want to be your home. I want you to feel safe and secure with me. Feels adored and loved because you are you. I love your little sweet strange noises that you let out in your sleep. I love to bear your cold feet between my legs as long as you're fine. I love your smacking when something tastes good to you and your roaring and moaning while immersed in one of your games. I love your intentional off-key singing in the early morning shower and your absurd obsession with strawberries. All this might annoy and irritate someone else, but I love it because it's yours."  
Baekhyun's sniff became a loud sob and his eyes were in tears.  
"I know it will be impossible to marry you, and if I could, I probably would not even be able to marry you. I should be so realistic. But I still want to spend my life with you. The only thing that matters to me is to be by your side till the end of my life." I pulled out the box and opened it so that Baekhyun could see the ring. It was just a very simple silver ring. Rather of the ordinary kind, so that he could always wear it, without causing a stir. Besides, I had no money for diamonds or anything like that. So, I had just had our names engraved. "So, I ask you if you accept me as your home and want to stay with me forever."  
“D-don’t you want to marry me anymore?" He asked me uncertainly instead of giving me an answer.  
Irritated, I blinked at him. "O-of course but we can’t. Are not allowed to."  
"So, you really want to marry me?" He sobbed and wiped the tears from his flushed cheeks with the back of his hand.  
"Yes of course. I want to be with you forever," I answered quickly, before he could really start crying.  
"Then ask the question right."  
I took the ring out of the box and reached for his left hand. Tenderly, I kissed his fingertips, before I completely covered his ring finger with small kisses. A soft sigh from him made me look up to him. His eyes were slightly overcast and had something of his typical bedroom eyes as he looked down at me. Our eyes met and he bit his lower lip. I swallowed hard and brushed the ring over his finger. I admired the ring on his beautiful hand and then slid my fingers between his so that they could devour each other. Slowly, I looked up at him and took a deep breath.  
"Byun Baekhyun, do you want to marry me and spend your life with me until death separates us?"  
"Yes," he breathed softly. "To everything yes."  
Smiling, I straightened up again, released my hand from his and covered his face with both hands. I caressed his cheekbones with my thumbs. His chocolate brown eyes fluttered shut and I could not help nudging his nose with mine before I rubbed playfully our noses together until he curled his in that particular way that made me weak.  
His warm, mellow breath touched my face. He went a bit on his tiptoes to close the gap. I closed my eyes and tilted my head slightly so that our lips could meet for the longed-for kiss. The kiss we had been waiting for since the morning when we parted ways.

Flashback  
For the first three days after the men's room incident, as I called my first intimate encounter with Baekhyun, I avoided him. I first had to be clear about a few things. Especially with the fact that I had given a guy a blow job while I had never had one in my life. We both had been drunk, and I really had no idea how we ended up in the bathroom. Of course, I was attracted to him, after all, he was really beautiful. Prettier than any girl I've ever seen.  
After breaking up with Haemin, I started to realise the feelings that I developed for Baekhyun, because after three days, I once again brought my friends to training and so I saw him again.  
The first encounter was a bit embarrassing at first, but when we talked about it in a quiet moment, we pushed it on the alcohol, but admitted that we were attracted to each other. But since it was the first time for both of us, we wanted to see how it goes without any pressure and get to know each other first. And we did that as discreetly as possible, by hanging out in the group, eating with them or going to karaoke. And more and more often I no longer accompanied my friends home, but Baekhyun. Since he was not from Seoul, he lived in a dorm like Jongdae, Minseok, Kyungsoo and Yixing. Although Bucheon was not all that far from Seoul but since the trainees had long, exhausting days, especially those who attended school, it was better for them to live near the entertainment.  
We quickly realized that we had the same humour, liked the same films, were both crazy about video games and loved Marvel. On the side, I learned that we both had older siblings. He a brother and I a sister. While I could not eat spicy food, he did not get a bite if cucumber was in it. Every evening when I bring him home, we had to stop at his favourite bubble tea store so he could get one. Always with strawberry flavour, because he loved strawberries. And I found out that he froze fast, because I had to borrow my scarf or cap on one occasion or another while walking the streets late at night. When he returned my scarf in front of his front door and thanked me with a beaming smile, my knees went soft and butterflies fluttered in my stomach. And when I lay in my bed in the evening, sniffing at my scarf for his smell, it made me more and more aware that I had actually fallen in love with him.  
The fact that I talked to him over kakao talk every evening until late in the night intensified only these unfamiliar feelings. Still, I first had to talk about being in love with my big sister until I understood that it was really more than friendly, and I had actually developed romantic feelings for Baekhyun. Of course, during the conversation, I did not hint that I was talking about a boy. Too big was my fear that she thinks that I’m disgusted or did not take me seriously.  
I also did not dare to talk to my friends about it. They were always raving about girls and all I could think about was a boy who had turned my whole world upside down and just with a smile.  
I could not yet say that Sehun's saying "Maybe your love of your life is waiting for you around the next corner " applies to me. After all, I was only 17 and still too young to know that Baekhyun could be just that. Besides, I did not even know if my feelings were reciprocated by him. But I had to find out and asked him for a date.  
Of course, I did not mention that it was a date. I had quite friendly asked him if he did not feel like hanging out with me in one of the arcades on Sunday. Maybe I also told a white lie and claimed that maybe Sehun and Jongin would join us. He agreed and exactly three weeks after the toilet incident, we would meet alone for the first time without his bandmates and friends.  
I took the bus to Gangnam. Actually, I could have taken the subway, but the bus stop was right in front of the dorm where Baekhyun lived. I was terribly nervous and played with the small bracelet I made myself. Since I was unable to sleep almost all night with excitement, at some point I started to make colourful beaded bracelets with Yoora's crafting utensils. At first, I thought I could give it to my friends as a friendship ribbon, but then I came up with the idea to make Baekhyun one. One thing I could give him, if I confessed to him, that I had fallen in love with him. And if I was lucky, he would accept both. The little bracelet and my love.  
But only one by one. First, I had to pick him up and spend a hopefully memorable day with him before I could burst the bomb. My chances with him were 50-50. Either he felt the same and would give us a chance, or he saw no more than a friend in me and I could never look him in the face of shame again.  
"No risk, no fun," I mumbled as I got off the bus.  
Baekhyun was waiting for me in front of the dorm and beamed at me. It was a gray, dull day and the air smelled of snow, but when I saw Baekhyun's smile, everything lit up as if he were my own personal sun. However, the air still smelled of snow and I was sure that it would start to snow today.  
"I hope you are dressed warm," I greeted him with a grin. "Today it's too cold so I could borrow you anything from me without myself freezing to death."  
Baekhyun laughed and shook his head. "Don’t worry, I'm wrapped up warm and wear several layers. I even have two pairs of socks on."  
I tugged at his knit cap, so his ears were completely protected. He hid his smile, burying himself in his scarf up to his nose, leaving only his dark brown eyes visible. But as his eyes smiled, he betrayed himself anyway. My heart started beating faster because of hid cuteness.  
"Where are we going?" He mumbled into the scarf.  
"To Sinchon," I told him. "We'll be on the road for a while. I hope that does not bother you."  
"Why should it? Let's go."  
While we were waiting for the bus, we talked about the last Marvel movie we had each watched and agreed that we should go together in the next. Internally I hoped that would be possible after this day. The bus we climbed into was terribly crowded and in the first 15 minutes we were pressed together. Not that his closeness would bother me, but I was afraid that he might hear my loud beating heart. I also got uncomfortably hot. Only after 20 minutes were finally free places that we could confiscate. The rest of the trip we spent in silence but shared my headphones and listened to music together.  
"Is this a university?", Baekhyun suddenly asked me and I looked past him out of the window.  
"Yeah, that's Yonsei University."  
Baekhyun grunted in understanding and leaned back in his seat. "What are you planning to do after school? Do you want to study? Or are you about to do your military service so you can get over it?"  
"On one side, I'd like to get it over with as quickly as possible, but I promised Sehun we'll do it together, and now he's becoming an idol, I'll probably wait a good ten years," I smirked. "Idols hesitate for as long as possible."  
"Hm ... yes, at least the successful ones," Baekhyun sighed. "I wish we did not have to do that. Is this thinking, you are only an honourable man, if you were in the military, a bit outdated? I feel a lot of pressure from it. As an idol you will certainly be observed and judged more or sentenced."  
"You play so many shooting games, but you don’t like the weapon yourself?" I asked in surprise.  
"That's different, Chanyeol. Game and reality are two different things. In real life, I never want to aim a weapon on anyone," Baekhyun muttered, taking the In Ear out of his ear.  
"And when it comes to life and death? To your life and death?" I asked.  
"Are we being deep here?" He laughed softly. "Let's not talk about sad things. Would you rather tell me where and what you would like to study?"  
I would have liked to have answered you and your body, but I did not want to scare him immediately. "To be honest I want to go to Yonsei. I have already inquired a bit and I'm really interested in the direction of architecture and especially interior design. Maybe some literary side by side."  
"Nothing musical? You play so many instruments. Would not that be good for you?" He blurted out in amazement.  
Slowly, I shook my head. "I like it as a hobby. Music is very important to me, I love it, but I'm afraid if it's something I have to do, even if I do not feel like it, I'll lose that love."  
Baekhyun nodded thoughtfully. "I haven’t seen it that way yet. Great," he laughed dryly. "Now I'm not so sure if it's a good idea to become an idol."  
"Hyung, don’t talk nonsense," I exclaimed heatedly. "You are made for it. You are under contract for just a month and already have a debut in front of you. You rock that and become Everybody's darling. Just wait!   
Baekhyun bit his lower lip before burying his face in his scarf. I could clearly see his red-hot cheeks and I smiled into myself. That was a good sign, right?  
Arriving at our destination, we left the bus and I grabbed Baekhyun's wrist to guide him in the direction we needed to go. "Come hyung, we have to go there."  
Without saying anything, he followed me. He also did not try to free his hand from mine, despite his red head. I also took this as a good sign.  
In the arcade we immediately jumped in all sorts of games. And I found out that Baekhyun was at least as ambitious and aggressive as I was. When we played against each other, we did not give anything, but strangely I could not be offended or disappointed if he won. With any other, I would have rioted, but I just could not be angry if he was so cute. After a few shooting games, we switched to more physically active games. And after only two rounds of Dance Dance Revolution, I gave up completely exhausted.  
"You know, that's not fair. You can dance as an idol," I gasped out of breath as we gathered our things together so the next could play.  
Baekhyun, unlike me, was slightly sweaty, but his sweaty hair hung in his forehead. His cheeks were flushed slightly by the effort, but his eyes lit up as he looked up at me, full of his thick jacket, sweater, scarf and hat in his arms. "I only won because Jongin and Sehun were not there. I would have gone down mercilessly against them," he laughed happily.  
I huffed. "Then I wouldn’t have dared to go on the mat."  
"Speaking of Jongin and Sehun. Didn’t they want to follow?"  
Damn it! Guiltily, I pressed my lips together. "Uhm ... yeah ... the thing is ... erm" I stammered, trying to avoid his gaze. I sat down at a table in the Food Corner and Baekhyun sat down opposite me. "I think I have to confess something to you," I sighed.  
"Huh?" He asked, tilting his head.  
"I just said that, so you agree to come with me. I thought if you knew I wanted to be alone with you, you would have refused. So ... it was never intended that the two would come to us." Nervously I chewed on my lower lip and stared at the tabletop. "I'm sorry," I mumbled my apology.  
"Pfffhahahaha," he laughed suddenly, and I looked up in surprise. "Then I should confess something to you too," he chuckled as his laughter subsided. "I was frankly disappointed when you said they would follow suit."  
"What?" I asked in surprise.  
"I was hoping we would be alone with each other," he mumbled again, totally shy.  
I stared at him in disbelief. "Why would you want that?"  
"Why did you want it?" He countered.  
"Because I ... I ... I", I stammered nervously, and I got terribly hot. "I like you."  
"Oh," he breathed disappointed and alarmingly I sat straight up.  
"Why did you want to be alone with me?"  
"Because ..." he paused and buried his face behind his hands. "You said before I would surely be Everybody's darling, but I'd be fine if I'm just be the darling for one person," he mumbled behind his hands.  
"You ... you mean ... that you ..." I could not help but stammer.  
Baekhyun spread his fingers and peeked in between. "Yes ... I was hoping I could be your darling. I ... I like you very, very, very much. With racing heart, butterflies in the stomach and sweaty hands. Everything that belongs to."  
"Oh my god, Baekhyun," I breathed and rummaged quickly and excitedly out of my pocket my homemade bracelet. "Can I have your hand, please?"  
Hesitantly, Baekhyun dropped his hands from his face and held out his right hand. He looked expectantly at me as I brushed the wristband over his hand until it loosely hung around his slender wrist. "I did that for you last night, because I only could think of you and therefore could not sleep."  
With his graceful fingers he stroked the little chain. His whole features became so gentle and a wave of affection rolled over me.  
"I wanted to ask you if you would like to be my boyfriend. That was my plan for today," I confessed.  
He looked up at me. "You want to date me?"  
I nodded as confidently as I could. "Yes."  
"Although I debut in four months? And I will have very little time when it really starts? And we have to keep that a secret from everyone?" Baekhyun did not seem to believe that I was serious.  
"Hyung, I can’t promise if I can handle it all. But I would bite my ass forever if we did not try. I'm ready to try it and do whatever it takes to make it work, because what I feel for you I've never felt for someone else."  
"Chanyeol, we're only 17", he laughed softly. "So much love experience we haven’t yet collected."  
"Do you know that I had a girlfriend when we landed in the bathroom three weeks ago? And that I broke up with her the next day? I've been wondering for days whether I'm gay or not and I still can’t answer that question. I don’t know if I am generally into men. All I know is that I've fallen in love with you and I don’t care if you're male or female. Maybe I'm just Baekhyun sexual."  
Baekhyun laughed. "You're stupid."  
"Yeah, maybe," I grinned. "But you like me."  
Baekhyun's laughter ebbed away, but his expression softened. "Yes, I do. Very much," he breathed.  
"And then what is your answer?"  
"Of course, yes, but I feel like I should have asked, after all, I'm the older one," he pouted.  
"But only six months, actually, I don’t have to call you hyung. But I think it's so cute that you blush when I call you that."  
Embarrassed, he put his hands on his cheeks. "Is that so obvious?"  
"Yes, hyung," I laughed, making him pout even more. "But since you are the older of us, I leave you the step for the first kiss we experience soberly. Unfortunately, I can’t remember if we kissed three weeks ago."  
"We have," he muttered softly, biting his lower lip. "That fell rather under wet and sloppy. And I'm sure we can do a lot better that way."  
"Oh god," I groaned in frustration. "I didn’t make a good first kiss impression."  
"We were both drunk, Chanyeol." He got up from his seat and sat down beside me instead.  
"But now we are sober," I stated, staring at his mouth.  
"Exactly," he whispered, moving as close to me as he could.  
"May I hold your hand?" I asked uncertainly. Instead of answering, he simply shoved his hand into mine. It was so small in contrast to mine and disappeared completely into my paw, until his tender fingers pushed between mine.  
"Cute," he commented teasingly. "I really have to hold your hand during our first real kiss."  
I took a breath to protest or to defend myself, but every sound was stifled directly as Baekhyun put his lips to mine. His lips were warm and soft and tender and ... shit, I never wanted to feel other lips on mine again. My eyes closed and I kissed him back. First tentatively and carefully, until I felt a slight pressure on my hand. Baekhyun tightened his grip and I began to trust myself more. I kissed him like I kissed my ex-girlfriends. I nibbled on his lower lip and begged for more. A shiver ran down my spine as I felt Baekhyun's finger from his free hand in the back of my hair. Trembling, I inhale through my nose, gripping his hip with my hand to pull him closer to me. He gasped softly and gave me the opportunity to push my tongue into his mouth. He did not even seem surprised, however, teasing my tongue with his own and engaging it in a playful dance. This kiss had nothing at all of being wet and sluggish. He was tender, loving and perfect.  
"I told you, we can do it better," Baekhyun laughed rough and breathless, before I tangled him in the next kiss.

Flashback end

"Chanyeol," Baekhyun breathed into the kiss and wrapped his arms around my middle. "I love you so much. Thanks for the last six years. It certainly was not always easy with me and I'm so happy that you want to endure me much longer."  
"Endured much longer?" I huffed in amusement, loosening my lips from his. "For a lifetime I want to endure you and I will enjoy every second of this eternity."  
"Uhhhh chessey," he laughed, slipping his hands from my back onto my hips. Determined he pushed me in the direction of the bed. "How long have you been planning this?" He asked softly and I sat down on the mattress as my knees hit the bed.  
"Five months maybe ?!" I mumbled, looking up at him innocently as he gasped for air. "So, this is not a spontaneous action. I had enough time to realize what that means to us. Besides, I needed the time to get the money for the ring together. I wanted something special, but in the end, it was just a simple ring. You deserve much more. When I finish studying and I get a good job as an interior designer, I'll buy you a nicer one from my first salary."  
"What are you talking about?" Baekhyun dismayed and sat down on my lap. "The ring is perfect. I can always wear it, because it suits everything and does not stand out. It has also been chosen by you with much love. I don’t want another."  
I smiled slightly. He spoke the truth. That's exactly what he felt. He would never lie to me just to make me feel better. "So, it would have been enough for you if I had made you a new pearl ring?" I asked amused. At each anniversary I had made a ring for him, just as I had given him a bracelet for our first date exactly six years ago. And it was exactly these five he had worn at the concert tonight. Not for the first time on this tour I had to say.  
"Of course," he nodded gravely, unbuttoning my shirt. "I love every single ring and they are very important to me. Won’t I get one this year? "He sounded almost disappointed.  
"I thought the six-year-anniversary is due for a real engagement ring," I chuckled, but rowed back when he actually looked at me disappointed. "But if you really want one, I'll make you one as soon as we get back to Seoul."  
"Yes, please," he breathed and pressed a kiss on my mouth. "By the way, I have something for you too."  
I raised my eyebrows questioningly. "What?"  
"Me!" He whispered, untying the knot from the belt of his bathrobe. He bit his lower lip as the fabric of the coat fell off his shoulders exposing his upper body.  
Sharp, I drew in the air. How could I forget that? Baekhyun was always very greedy for sex that day. We had a pretty balanced sex life. In comparison to other couples we were certainly below the average, but only because Baekhyun's idol existence did not always play into our cards and he was often not there or was just too exhausted for sex. But if we had the opportunity, nothing stopped us. So, it could happen that after weeks without sex that we at once do almost nothing else for days than just that and we just paused for eating and sleeping. To make up for lost time, so to speak. In the last few years, we had always had the time for that on our anniversary, because there had never been a concert on the very day or the next. But this time it was different. Baekhyun had just finished a concert and in a few hours, he would be back on stage. So, I hesitated uncertainly.  
"Baby, I think that's not a good idea," I began cautiously. "Two hours ago, you were still on stage and tomorrow you also have a concert. How do you want to perform and dance?"  
"Pleeeeaaaseee Yeollie," he pouted, running his fingers down my chest and down to my stomach and waistband.  
"Aren’t you tired," I sighed.  
"I'm never too tired for you," he purred beside my ear like a kitten.  
"That still doesn’t change the fact that you have to be on stage for almost three hours tomorrow," I protested weakly, but my defence mechanism left a lot to be desired, as one of my hands had already pushed into Baekhyun's neck and the other pressed him closer to me on his tailbone.  
"Then just be very gentle to me," he breathed into my ear before he kissed it and nibbled on my earlobe.  
With both hands I took his face in my hands and forced him to look at me. I looked into his eyes and slowly he blinked at me. One time I read that in cat language meant something like that "I love you". Staring and blinking slowly. Baekhyun's gaze was so intense that I was sure that I could translate the cat language to my boyfriend. When I did not respond and just kept looking at him, he licked his lips impatiently. His beautiful mouth opened to speak, but all the words fell silent as I approached his face and kissed his mole on his temple. I turned his head slightly and kissed his birthmark on the ear, before turning back to the right side and kissing the other on his cheek, close to his cute nose.  
Trembling and expectant, Baekhyun inhaled. He probably expected me to kiss his trademark next, but instead I lowered my head and kissed his molethroat just where the collarbone bones met in the middle. From there, I smoothly ran my lips along his neck, over his larynx, to the bottom of his chin, where the next mole was. Baekhyun had automatically tipped his head back and let out a faint whimper from his mouth as I kissed the birthmark, so rare to see. To hidden it lay at the bottom of the chin. But I knew every single mole of him and that on each body part. I knew all the old and every new one. I was always the first to discover something new on his body or face. I could draw a kind of map of his body out of my head.  
"Cha-chan-yeol," he breathed. "Pl-please!"  
Smiling, I accepted his request and kissed his famous mole at the corner of his mouth. I lived the dream of many fans. When you were in the crowd like that, you heard a thing or two. So, I knew what the fans dreamed of when it came to my boyfriend. And that was one of the many things I had to hear. Once to kiss his mole at his mouth. I did it almost daily, but it had never become normal for me.  
Baekhyun pursed his lips so I finally found my way to where he wanted me. Giggling, I kissed his mole again and again and again until he started whining. I pressed my lips to his for a gentle kiss.  
"Gentle you said, right?"  
"Mhhhm," he sighed into the kiss.  
"When did I ever denied you?" I mumbled obediently and completely freed him from the bathrobe.  
Triumphantly, he wrapped his arms around my neck and pressed himself so tightly against me that I fell backward with him in my arms. With a broad and happy grin, he looked down at me. "Never," he whispered.  
"Oh well. But don’t get cocky and demand more rigor, after all we can’t risk that you cannot walk tomorrow."  
Baekhyun rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah ... I will be happy with everything you will give me. But please, do something. I've been waiting for it since my solo stage."  
"So, that’s why you looked so exaggerated to me when you did your body rolls?" I laughed.  
"Exactly Sherlock!", He grinned, but let out a squeak when I brought him with my strength under me and he had to look up at me.  
"Tease," I mumbled, kissing his neck.  
"Did it work?" He asked with a sigh.  
"Too good," I confessed. "But you still only get gentle today."  
"It's okay for me," he groaned. "I belong to you. Do whatever you want with me."  
Oh god ... he was mine. He wanted to belong to me. Only now did it begin to seep. He really said yes. A Yes for a forever. With me. Tears came to my eyes uncontrollably and I buried my face in his chest.  
Mine! Mine! Mine! Everything mine!  
"Yeol?" There was concern in his voice. "What's going on?" His fingers brushed my hair and I sobbed softly.  
"Mine! You are mine!" I exclaimed in a broken voice. "I'm just starting to realize that you said yes. Mine! Mine! Mine!"  
"Yes yours. Only yours," Baekhyun agreed softly. "And not just since today. I've been yours since the first moment. And I will always be yours."  
This moment was too good to be true.


	3. Chapter 3

I just couldn't take my eyes off him. From the time I woke up and I felt his warm breath on the back of my neck, my brain tried to catch up with everything that had happened last night.

His arms were possessively wrapped around my middle. As if he was afraid, I would want to disappear. But that was by far the last thing I wanted. I didn't want to be anywhere else but in his arms and pressed tight against his perfect body. The breath-taking body that I never got enough of. Whom I loved to touch, caress, kiss. The broad shoulders, the well-toned upper body and his narrow hip. I loved it when my fingers followed his six pack and he loved it too. Six years ago, I could never have imagined that this skinny boy with the chicken breast would become the love of my life. But six years later this naked Adonis lay behind me in bed and wanted to marry me. Six years! For our age it was a long time that we were together. How often has it happened that at 17 you found the one you wanted to spend your life with? At the beginning of a relationship, people always thought, "This is him! I'm getting old with him!” But at some point, when you were so young, that feeling of eternity disappears. Two or three years later, when life was really serious and you developed in different directions, you could usually see the end. When it came out that we were together, nobody gave us two years. Not even our families, friends or band members. It would be too stressful to be famous, to be in the spotlight all the time and secretly to have a relationship. Sooner or later we would only hurt ourselves. They were all even more surprised when we reported that we had been together for two years, so we nullified their prediction. And yes, it was stressful, and we didn't just hurt each other once, but we loved each other. Youthful enthusiasm became unconditionally love. Acceptance was one of the many keys to a happy relationship.

When I carefully turned around to hug him and did not successfully wake him, I was able to take the time to admire his relaxed face. He always woke up before me most of the time and when I did it was only because I couldn't sleep any longer and had appointments. I rarely saw this exposed face. So completely peaceful and relaxed. If we had seen each other in the past few weeks, he had always seemed stressed. Sometimes I had to stroke the wrinkle between his eyebrows. I hated to see him stressed out. Usually he was always my haven of peace, taking the pace out of my stressful life. Who kept me on the ground and hugged me protectively when I threatened to collapse from all the pressure. But his graduation was getting closer. His designs for his thesis were breath-taking and I couldn't wait to see them expanded at some point. But most of the pressure he felt was that he hadn't yet got a job in one of the architects' offices where he had applied. I could calm him down so many times that he didn't have to worry about finances because I made enough money for both of us, but he didn't want to hear that. He didn't want to be dependent on me. That was never the deal between us.

As peaceful as he looked, he looked vulnerable. His big dark brown eyes, which always looked at me like I was a miracle, were closed. His full lips, which could kiss me in every possible way, were slightly open and his warm breath puffed into my face. His black hair was dishevelled and looked like a bird's nest. With a smile, I ran my fingers through his dark strands to loosen a few knots here and there. This woke him up. At first his nose curled before slowly opening his eyes and blinking at me wearily. Oh god, I wanted to protect him from all the evil in this world.

"Hey, are you already awake?" He croaked in a rough, morning voice that made me smile. "Ohhh, such a bright smile in the early morning? You blinding me” he joked, trying to protect his eyes from my rays with one hand. 

"Good morning, home," I laughed softly, hugging him more and pushing my leg between his.

"Home?" He asked confused.

I nodded seriously. "Hm yes, you asked me if you could be my home and I said yes."

"So instead of fiancé you call me home?" He smiled.

"Yes, but should I tell you something?"

"What?"

I rubbed my nose playfully on his. "You have been my home all the time. Even if we live separately, I feel most comfortable with you."

Chanyeol was silent for a moment before he gave me a gentle kiss on the mouth. "Do you think we can finally live together now? You and me all alone?"

"I hope so. You promised me to create a home together. I'll take your word for it.” I rubbed my nose against his before I buried my face in his throat.

"Have I ever broken my promises?" He murmured into my hair, running his hands down my back to my bum as I shook my head slightly. "And how is your butt doing? Everything okay down there?"

I laughed against his neck. "All good. I will have no problems. You were very careful.” I gently breathed a kiss under his ear. "I love you!"

"I love you too, baby!" I felt his lips on my hair before he spoke again, gently massaging my butt. "We have to tell the boys. Or do they already know?"

"I think they already know. At least Kyungsoo saw your banner. But it may also be that he didn’t take it seriously,” I murmured and supported myself with my elbow next to his head. "But none of them asked me about it on the way back."

"How do you think they'll take it in?" He looked up at me questioningly and I chewed uncertainly on my lower lip before answering.

"I guess they will all react differently to it. Sehun and Jongin will be happy for us, after all, they are your best friends. Junmyeon will not be so thrilled because he knows what risk I am taking.”

"And do you also know what kind of risk you are taking?" He asked me worriedly and freed my lower lip from my teeth with his thumb.

"If you mean if I know that I'm risking my career for you, then yes. I am also aware that I am not only jeopardizing mine, but also that of the boys. But before I go, I will make sure that they aren’t get blamed for that.”

"Wh-why are you doing this? Why are you ready for it?”, He breathed softly and disbelievingly.

"Because everything in this world is replaceable, but you I can't. I can also be happy in another job. But I can't be happy without you. Six years, Chanyeol. We have been together for six years. You love me the way I am and not the way I should be for others. Your love is honest I could never say the same thing about someone else. Also, I very much doubt that I could ever love someone else the way I love you.”

"Okay, now I'm going to start crying," he smiled shakily and with my fingers I caught the first tears at the corner of his eyes.

"Yes, I see it," I smiled tenderly. "I think we deserve us, huh?"

Chanyeol nodded silently and lifted his head to blow a kiss on my mouth. "We'll tell them at breakfast."

"Okay, do we want to bet who reacts how?" I smiled into the kiss.

Flashback

Trembling, Chanyeol took a deep breath. His whole upper body trembled with nervousness and that worried me. I have never seen him like this. He wasn't even that excited on our first date and when he asked me if I wanted to be with him, but this time he really seemed scared. And I could understand him well. He had to do something I did three years ago. There was not much I could do for him than just stand by him while he took the step. A step that was long overdue. And since I had just a few hours off, I had offered to accompany him.

"Yeollie, if you don't feel ready for it, you don't have to. Nothing will change between us if you still wait with it.” I stroked his back lovingly. We were standing on an open street and I couldn't hug and kiss him as I normally would.

"No, I don't want to delay it any longer. It's not fair,” he sighed, rubbing his face. "How did you do it back then?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "I don’t know. I just said it as it is."

"It will be such a surprise for them when I say it. After all the girlfriends I had in middle school, they definitely don't think that ... that I ... "

"Are gay," I finished his sentence. "But maybe she suspects something. After all, you suddenly had no girlfriend one day after you got to know me and how often I walked in and out in our first year was already noticeable for being a rookie idol who usually won’t spent his only one scarce free time with just one friend when there is nothing more. The worst thing that could happen is that she hates and blames me.”

Chanyeol shook his head hastily. "No ... no, she loves you. You and Kyungsoo. She world love to adopt you."

"Me and Kyungsoo? But that's a strange combination. We are so different,” I laughed softly.

"Maybe that's why. Baek ... when I'm about to come out in front of my mother and sister, can I tell them we're together? I think two years of hide and seek is enough now. The better known you become, the more we need hideaways where we can simply be ourselves.”

I hesitated for a moment. It was hard enough to come out, but to present your boyfriend was bold. But he was right, we slowly needed every support we could get and when his mother was ready to give it to me, I was only too happy to introduce myself to her as a future son-in-law. "Okay ... I hope she doesn't chase me out of the house immediately. I love her spaghetti carbonara.”

With a faint smile, he turned to me. "I'd love to kiss you now, but ..."

"I know," I interrupted. "We'll definitely get an opportunity for that later."

"O-okay," he breathed deeply. "I'll get it over with."

With his house key, he opened the door of his parents' house. Already in the entrance area we could hear his mother singing in the kitchen. In the two years I was with Chanyeol and in which we spent most of his time in his room before moving to a dorm near the Yonsei, I had his mother either in the kitchen or in her garden encountered. This time she was probably preparing dinner.

"Eomma!" Chanyeol called, announcing his arrival. The singing stopped and Mrs. Park stuck her head out of the kitchen in surprise. "Chanyeollie?"

"Hi Eomma," Chanyeol greeted his mother quietly this time.

"I wasn't expecting you," she beamed at her son before she looked at me. "And you brought Baekhyunnie too." She beckoned us into the kitchen. As a greeting, she patted our cheeks and stroked our hair. "Please sit down. I'm busy baking a cake for Yoora. What brings you here? Above all you my dear. Shouldn't you be busy with Exo?” She turned directly to me.

"Uhm ... I have a few hours off and Eomma, you know that I spend every free minute with Chanyeollie." For one and a half years I have also called Chanyeol's mother Eomma. When she found out that my parents did not live in Seoul at the time, she was so eager to be my substitute mother and at some point I gave in when Chanyeol said to me that she would become my mother-in-law someday.

"Of course, I'm happy to see you," she smiled, pinching my cheek.

"We are here because I want to tell you something and maybe the best thing to do is sit down for it," Chanyeol tried to explain the main reason why we were here.

"Oh ... okay." Unsure, she sat down at the kitchen table with us. "What's up my son? You look so scared. Did you do something? Did you leave university? Did you get a girl pregnant?"

"What?" My boyfriend burst out loud. "None of this and believe me, the latter of all is unlikely to happen."

His mother raised her eyebrows. "Are you trying to tell me that you will never make me a grandmother?"

"As things stand at the moment, it won't happen in the future," he murmured. "Eomma, I'm in love ... but not with a girl."

His mother sighed softly and reached for his hand across the table. "I already knew that," she replied quietly and Chanyeol looked at his mother in surprise. Just like me. "You weren't exactly subtle," she laughed. "Even Aunt Jia would have noticed and this woman is half blind."

Chanyeols eyes widened. "Y-you kn-knew that Baek a-and I-I ..." he stammered in shock.

"Not from the beginning, but from the way you look at each other, I could imagine that you don't just have friendly feelings for one another. So, you wanted to confess to me today that you are gay?"

"Gay?" He whispered softly, shaking his head. "To be honest, I don't even think I'm gay. I don't know how to classify myself. I only know that I love Baekhyun. I never thought about it before him, and apart from him I find no other man attractive.”

"Thank Goodness," I murmured softly, keeping my eyes down. I didn't dare look at his mother because she still hadn't said how she felt about us.

"I really don't want to think negatively about that, you have to believe me," she finally sighed. "Baekhyun, I love you like a son, but I don't know if you're so good for Chanyeol."

"I see," I murmured. "I am sorry."

"You are an idol. Press and fans follow you at every turn. You already have so little time. How are you going to build and maintain a relationship when you have to keep it completely secret? I know you would never hurt Chanyeol on purpose, but that's what it will end up being.”

I could only nod because she was right about everything. The press and fans were like an annoying shadow, at times I didn't even have time to sleep and in the two years I had accidentally hurt my boyfriend a couple of times. Of course, a mother didn't want her child to be in such an unhealthy relationship. So, I could understand everything very well.

"Eomma, but we've been together for two years," Chanyeol said calmly. “We have survived all of this in two years. I was aware from the start that I would be his secret and as long as it was okay for me it should be for everyone else. After all, it's about me and I know best what I can endure and what I can't.” Under the table he reached for my hand, clasped his fingers with mine and demonstratively put our intertwined hands on the table.

"Eomma, I love him, and I do everything to protect him. But you're right, it's difficult to keep our relationship secret from the public. That's why we want to gradually inaugurate the most important people in our lives, because we need all the support we can have.” I looked at her earnestly.

"You kept it a secret for two years?" She asked surprised and we nodded in agreement. "Do your parents know, Baekhyun?"

"They've known for three years that I'm more attracted to men than women, but they still don't know that Chanyeol and I are a couple," I answered.

"But they should," she chided me.

"They will too," I promised her.

"And your band? Your friends?"

"You're the first, Eomma," Chanyeol murmured. "But the boys are still on it today."

She sighed loudly and her eyes lost nothing of concern. "I'm not judging you guys. But there is nothing I can do about it that I still worry. Just promise me that you will protect each other."

We did, but we knew that she was not a hundred percent happy that Chanyeol had chosen me. If only I hadn't been an idol ...

An hour later we had to take the next step, but this time it was me who was more nervous. We were not in front of my parents, but in front of my second family. I asked everyone to gather in the living room of our dorm. Nobody found Chanyeol present to be strange. They were used to him hanging around here more often. His friendship with Sehun and Jongin has often served us as a good alibi. Our so-called friendship was also accepted without problems, although Sehun sometimes complained that I would confiscate his best friend far too often. Jongin, on the other hand, only smiled knowingly and I was afraid that he knew more than he admitted.

“Okay Baek, why did you want us all to be gathered here?” Junmyeon asked so wonderfully clueless.

I cleared my throat nervously and played around with my fingers as I tried to look at the band members' faces without dying of shame. I wasn't ashamed of being gay and of being with a man. Rather, it was the reason why I hadn't said anything for so long and partly lied to them. "Since the dating ban has been lifted, I would like to tell you that I am currently in a relationship."

"Oh, that was quick, Hyung," Kyungsoo wondered as Sehuns eyebrows narrowed slightly. It looked like the Maknae was adding up one and one in the head.

"To be honest, I hadn't followed the ban all along and was in this relationship before the debut." It was harder for me to confess than I thought.

"Ahhh and Chanyeol knew about it and served as an alibi," Jongdae concluded.

Sehuns eyes went to Chanyeol and his inner calculation seemed to be working. At least his wide eyes revealed that he had probably found the solution. "Hyung was never an alibi," he murmured softly.

"Already noticed?" Jongin whispered, giggling and the eyes of the others wandered confused between me, Chanyeol and the Maknaes.

"What do you mean by that?" Junmyeon asked confused.

Chanyeol got up from his seat, stood next to me and put his hand in mine. "That means I've been his secret boyfriend for two years."

"Oh fuck," Yixing breathed. "So, my feeling didn't betray me that Baekhyun is gay."

I bit my lower lip and blushed under their stares.

"For two years?" Breathed our leader. "How could I never notice that?"

"I had suspected it for over a year," Jongin admitted. "I noticed how the two share their food with each other. Baek doesn't share his food with anyone else."

Jongdae laughed. "You noticed something like that? Wasn't it the looks and the sneaky touches? Yes, I already thought my part."

"Yeah, so in retrospect it makes a lot of sense now," Minseok murmured.

"I thought I was your best friend, Hyung." Sehun looked at Chanyeol, deeply hurt. "Didn't you trust me?"

Chanyeols head hung like a beaten dog. "I didn't know how you would understand that I fell in love with Baekhyun as soon as he got around the corner. You had said before, maybe the big love is around the corner and boom, you were right. It was just not a girl, but a boy and ... just Baekhyun, with whom you are in a band and ... there is no excuse for my long silence, except that I wanted to protect him. If I had told you, I would not only have outed myself in front of you, but also him. "

"Hyung, why didn't you tell us?" Jongin asked me.

"I didn't know how you would react if you found out that I was gay. I didn't want to make our living uncomfortable for you. After all, I hadn't trained with you for so long. I was a trainee just a few weeks before I was officially selected as a member.”

"But two years, Baekhyun. Why for so long? “ Junmyeon breathed stunned. It was clear that he was not so happy about it. As a leader, he probably had other things in mind.

"I didn't want to harm the band. And at first Chanyeol and I wanted to test whether it really worked with us, after all he had never had anything with a boy, and I was a rookie. But the casual dating phase just became more, and we don't want to have to hide from family and friends anymore. Chanyeol and I love each other and want to stay together, and I ask you to help us not only as my band members but also as our friends.” I was fighting my tears as Chanyeol hugged me from behind and nuzzled his face against my cheek. I closed my eyes and sniffed softly. I couldn't stand Sehuns and Junmyeons disappointed faces.

Suddenly I felt two arms close around me from the front. A soft "Oh Hyung" told me that it was Kyungsoo. "I don't think differently about you than before and I'm there for you ... for both of you."

"Me too, after all I waited so long for it," came Jongins voice to the right of my ear and the next arms were closed around me and Chanyeol.

"Thank you Soo, thank you Nini," I sobbed.

"We would be really bad friends if we weren't there for you," commented Jongdae, joining the group hug.

"And even worse band members. We would give away our "We are one" slogan quite nicely, if not," agreed Minseok.

"I'm so happy that my feeling was right," chirped Yixing cheerfully. "You liked the ass slaps too much."

"Laaaay," Chanyeol groaned. "Only I can touch this butt. So, stay away."

Everyone in the group hug laughed. I opened my eyes and saw Sehun and Junmyeon still sitting in their seats. My eyes were slightly blurred from all the tears, but I could see Sehun rolling his eyes and getting up. "What the hell," he grumbled, hugging his best friend from behind. "I hate you, Hyung," he grumbled in Chanyeols ear.

"I love you too," chuckled Chanyeol.

"How do I explain this to our manager," Junmyeon sighed, but in the end, he gave us a bone-breaking hug.

Flashback end

"We should get ready and go to breakfast if we want to gently explain the others," Chanyeol murmured against my lips.

"You haven't submitted your tip yet," I pouted.

"Jun will probably have a nervous breakdown," Chanyeol said. "Sehun will be offended that I didn't take him to buy the ring."

I nodded thoughtfully. "Hm ... yes and Jongin will cry with joy while Kyungsoo is already planning our wedding dinner."

"Yixing must have felt it again," my boyfriend laughed, and I joined his laugh.

"And Jongdae and Minseok?" I giggled and hid my face in his throat.

"Supportive as always. After all, they're your best friends.” Yes, they were. Since we had CBX, the three of us have been much closer together.

"But now we should really take a shower." Promptly, he patted my butt, so I got up from him.

"Yes, yes," I moaned in agony and rolled off of him. I pulled the entire blanket away from him as it wrapped around my body. I lay in bed like a cocoon and looked up at him. I tinkled my eyelashes with a lot of Aegyo. I wanted him to take me to the bathroom.

"What does the Baek wrap want to tell me?" He laughed out loud.

"I'm not a wrap. I'm a butterfly,” I mumbled.

"First of all, you're a fat caterpillar. Only after hatching are you a butterfly."

"Are you trying to tell me I'm fat?" I cried outraged.

"You sell yourself as a caterpillar. But don't worry, if I unpack you here you are my little butterfly."

"Oh god Park, you're so strange," I breathed.

"Then just a wrap." With a grin, he let himself fall on me, that I acknowledged with a choked moan. "Then at least I can eat you up." Immediately he started kissing my face. "Nom nom nom."

Laughing and chuckling, I tried to kick him off me, but he was just too heavy. When he started biting down on my body, I almost cried with laughter. "Yah, yah, yah Park Chanyeol. Stop it! That tickles!” I called choked between my laughing fit.

A loud knock on the door interrupted our scramble in bed and we stopped breathing heavily.

"Baekhyun, open the door! I know you are awake. Your shouting can be heard in the corridor.” Junmyeon sounded angry and Chanyeol jumped out of bed instantly. He quickly put on his boxers and hurried to the door to open it to my leader. But he didn't come in alone. He had Kyungsoo and Sehun in tow. They stopped in astonishment in front of the bed.

"Okay Hyung, I'm not asking you now why you look well fucked," Sehun grinned broadly. This earned him a slap on his head from Kyungsoo and a punitive look from Junmyeon.

I groaned to a sitting position and covered my most intimate place with the blanket. My band members had all seen me naked, but they didn't have to see how the little fight with Chanyeol had excited me. "What's up, boys?"

Without another word, Junmyeon stuck his cell phone under my nose. "Your flirting hadn't gone unnoticed last night. Posts have appeared that question your sexuality. It's just a matter of time before any news sites get wind of it and start sniffing around to find out who this mysterious young man who boldly proposed to Baekhyun was.” Towards the end, Junmyeon voice grew louder and louder. "Damn it, it's not fun, Chanyeol."

"It was no fun," murmured the person addressed and slowly sat down on the bed with me.

"What?" Breathed all three at the same time and equally shocked.

"That was a real marriage proposal," I mumbled, lifting my left hand with the engagement ring on my finger.

"I think I'm going to pass out," breathed Junmyeon, swaying to the chair.

"What the fuck Chanyeol. Couldn't you have initiated me? With me you would have found a nicer ring,” Sehun complained.

"Hey, it's beautiful," I complained softly, pulling my hand away in offense.

"Couldn't you have made the proposal private?" Kyungsoo sighed.

"I did too. I did two. One to Exo Baekhyun and one to my Baekhyun. Come on, nobody will take this proposal seriously at the concert. How many times have you gotten marriage proposals? I was not the first and I will not be the last one,” Chanyeol tried to calm the mood.

Junmyeon waved a hand at him. "But Baekhyun accepted it. Usually we ignore it or politely refuse."

"I didn't say yes on stage," I rolled my eyes.

"But you accepted his banner. It's somewhat of a promise,” Sehun mused, scratching his head.

"How many times have we taken the girls' veils?" I countered. "None of us have married yet."

"Okay ... okay ..." Junmyeon murmured. "It's not like you're actually going to get married. You will only take this engagement as a symbol. As a promise to want to stay together forever."

"Uhm ..." I started hesitantly, "I actually plan to get married to Chanyeol, Hyung."

The silence of the grave spread across the room. Kyungsoo was the first to find his voice. "Cool ... cool ... what kind of cake do you want?"

"I'm your best man, only that that's clear," Sehun insisted, shaking Chanyeols arm.

"Stop, stop, stop," Junmyeon called. "You're serious, aren't you?"

I nodded.

"Okay, then we have to build the protective walls even higher. That means Chanyeol won't be watching the concert today.”

"But …"

"No buts," Junmyeon interrupted. "Under no circumstances should you be seen together. Not now when they're questioning Baekhyun. Grass has to grow over it first. If you are there, Baekhyun will only have eyes for you again. And you stand out, Chanyeol."

My boyfriend looked for help and I chewed on my lower lip. "Jun is right. I'm sorry, babe."

"That means you lock me up in the room?" Chanyeol whined.

"No, you can move freely, just not in the direction of the concert hall," Junmyeon said, looking at his watch. "I'll let our manager know. We'll meet for breakfast in half an hour. You can bring the happy news to the other four.” With a serious, business-like expression, he hurried out of the room and left the four of us behind.

"Why do I have the feeling that he just hates me and that he doesn't feel happy at all," Chanyeol asked softly, hugging himself.

"He's just worried about the band." I gently massaged his shoulder with one hand so that he relaxed a little.

"But honestly now. What kind of cake do you want?”, Kyungsoo asked with a serious expression that our Maknae was laughing.

"You still ask that? Pack in strawberries. Slowly you should know our Baekhyun Hyung."


End file.
